I don't know if I've ever actually come out and said exactly what is happening when Jason and I take off for our honeymoon. *Drumroll*
We are going on a Western Caribbean cruise! That's right - 8 glorious days to lounge around being married while we let everyone else take care of us. Saturday night after we make our grand exit, we are heading to the hotel and going to bed so that we can get up early the next day and drive to Galveston, where our cruise takes off from mid-afternoon.
From there, we sail to Montego Bay, Jamaica. After spending two and half "Fun Days at Sea" on the ship, we will be ready to get out and stretch our legs! We have been looking at shore excursions offered here and below are our favorites:
1. Royal Beach Experience with Lunch and Falls - in short, we get to climb a huge waterfall (over 600 ft!) hang out with dolphins, hang out on the beach in our private cabana, have a little lunch, and then get free foot massages!*
2. Dunn's River Falls and Dolphin Touch Encounter - with this one we also get to climb the waterfall, and then afterwards we are actually allowed to get in with the dolphins and take pictures and such. Then we get to enjoy a Jamaican-style buffet lunch.*
From Jamaica we head back out on the water until we reach Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands on the fourth day. We are a little disappointed in the lack of anything exciting to do excursion wise, but here are the three we've narrowed it down to:
1. Coral Reef and Stingray Safari - a boat ride to some pretty coral, and then an area heavily populated with stingrays. We can hold, touch and take pictures with them, too.
2. Stingray City Island Tour - a tour of a turtle farm/conservation center, a visit to the town of Hell, then a trip out to the stingray sandbar to feed them and such. On this one we get complimentary drinks (including rum punch) and get to listen to "great Caribbean music" as well.
3. Cayman parasail and beach escape - lasting only an hour and fifteen minutes, this excursion includes riding on a powerboat, parasailing (for 6-8 minutes), seeing some scenic views, and then exploring the beach (but only if we want to pay a taxi to take us back to the ship.)
Not really excited by Grand Cayman offerings. Maybe we'd be better off just exploring what we can of Grand Cayman on foot. When we cruised to Canada a few years ago, my family didn't pay to do any "organized" shore excursions, but there was still plenty to do and see (and buy!)
Our last leg of the trip before heading home is Cozumel, Mexico. Here, the activities promise to be more exciting, but which to choose?
1. Cozumel Bike and Snorkel Adventure - a triathlon of sorts. Biking, snorkeling, and then roaming the beach. While I initially balked at the idea of doing something this physical, the description does say the bike ride is "flat" and "paved." Not to mention that I hate to think of myself being such a lush for 8 days that I can'tbe bothered to do something besides be chauffered.
2. Mayan Jungle Explorer - ferry over to Playa del Carmen, bike through the jungle, do some zip-lining, watch a Mayan purification ceremony (performed by a "real Mayan Shaman") and have lunch before heading back. Again with the bike thing, but this one says the minimum age is 8 - I can keep up with an 8 year old, can't I?
3. Mexican Beach Cooking and Tasting - learn from a "prestigious chef" how to make authentic Mexican fare. Then eat it, paired with Mexican wines and an open bar. Then play around the water for a bit.
A little more excitement going on in Cozumel, eh? Now let's take a vote: which ones sound the most appealing to you from each city? Let's take another vote: who wants to treat K.C. and Jason to a honeymoon shore excursion!
Have any of you been on a cruise before - either this one or another one? Did you do any of the shore excursions? Were they worth it or would you rather have stayed back on the boat or done the free activities within walking/exploring distance? Should we do something in all three ports, or pick two, or even just pick one?
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Sunday, June 24, 2007
A spin on tradition
Racking your brain trying to come up with the perfect gift for parents, wedding party, or even just birthdays? Why not make a donation in the recipient's name. So many of us get caught up in the materialistic side of things, like having tangible favors (that will be tossed out if they ever even make it home with your guests.)
There are couples who decide to make donations instead. If they both believe in a common cause, they write a check to that organization, then announce to their friends and family what they've done, in the name of everyone else.
But isn't that a bit altruistic? Doesn't that really say that the couple didn't want to spend money on their favorite cause AND their guests, so decided to lump it all together? Wouldn't it be more charitable for a couple to tell guests to make donations in their name, instead of bringing a traditional gift? This would work especially well for those couples who are older, have furnished homes and don't need the starter-home type of gift.
For those who are still interested in making a difference in the world, there is still a way to do so without seeming quite so selfish. Instead of sending one lump sum to your chosen philanthropy, why not do a little more research and make the donations more personal?
For your animal-loving mother, you could make a donation to the SPCA. For the music loving cousin, a donation to ASCAP. While each organization wouldn't stand to inherit $1000, it would be more meaningful to each guest that you took the time to think about what truly mattered to them, and acted on it. Then it would totally unselfish, and thoughtful to boot!
If that seems like a nice idea, but realistically would be too much work for your fete of 500 closest friends, why not pick 3 or 4 charities, then go through your guest list and decide which of them each person would most likely identify with.
Having a hard time deciding how to name all the tables at the reception? Why not make a different donation for each table? Then your table card could have a picture of someone (or something) who has been impacted by the donation, as well as a brief history of the group you donated to.
This would work especially well for smaller parties, as thank you gifts. Even if Uncle Ned was the only one who would appreciate a donation to the preservation of blue-footed boobies, and even if that donation would up only being $10, every little bit helps, right?
There are couples who decide to make donations instead. If they both believe in a common cause, they write a check to that organization, then announce to their friends and family what they've done, in the name of everyone else.
But isn't that a bit altruistic? Doesn't that really say that the couple didn't want to spend money on their favorite cause AND their guests, so decided to lump it all together? Wouldn't it be more charitable for a couple to tell guests to make donations in their name, instead of bringing a traditional gift? This would work especially well for those couples who are older, have furnished homes and don't need the starter-home type of gift.
For those who are still interested in making a difference in the world, there is still a way to do so without seeming quite so selfish. Instead of sending one lump sum to your chosen philanthropy, why not do a little more research and make the donations more personal?
For your animal-loving mother, you could make a donation to the SPCA. For the music loving cousin, a donation to ASCAP. While each organization wouldn't stand to inherit $1000, it would be more meaningful to each guest that you took the time to think about what truly mattered to them, and acted on it. Then it would totally unselfish, and thoughtful to boot!
If that seems like a nice idea, but realistically would be too much work for your fete of 500 closest friends, why not pick 3 or 4 charities, then go through your guest list and decide which of them each person would most likely identify with.
Having a hard time deciding how to name all the tables at the reception? Why not make a different donation for each table? Then your table card could have a picture of someone (or something) who has been impacted by the donation, as well as a brief history of the group you donated to.
This would work especially well for smaller parties, as thank you gifts. Even if Uncle Ned was the only one who would appreciate a donation to the preservation of blue-footed boobies, and even if that donation would up only being $10, every little bit helps, right?
Friday, June 22, 2007
Guilty parties
My wonderful ladies have been coming to me with some neat ideas lately for my shower and my bachelorette party. Someone suggested a lingerie party, which is great because I could definitely use some, but on the other hand, I think my personal supply is limited because I'm so picky, and so oddly shaped. It's true that you become way less active after college. While I am in the process of trying to remedy that before October, I'm still in that awkward limbo zone.
One of the things I've read about lately and thought would be a neat idea is a honeymoon shower. Especially since I think we're doing a couples shower instead of ladies-only, it's not fair that most of the things we would get would be cutesy, girly things.
A honeymoon shower is also the perfect place to mention a honeymoon registry, too. I've seen testimonials of many a couple who could not have gone where they did and done what they did without the help of cash, cleverly disguised in a honeymoon registry.
While I know it's taboo to solicit gifts, because it's really all about the family and friends celebrating together, those who do want to mention something about gifts are faced with the difficulty of being tasteful about it. I came across this poem the other day, written by the bride's sister, explaining the honeymoon registry concept, and smoothly linking to the couple's own. The way it was worded, I don't think anyone would be offended.
From http://www.thebigday.com/help/KarenGenePoem.asp
It reads:
"Karen and Gene are planning to tie the knot,
off to Maui they'll go, but invited we're not.
The couple's sunset nuptials will come true
On Saturday, the 26th of October, 2002.
Per their request, no parties or showers and that's no lie,
but Karen's big sister, Debbie, would not comply.
Let's join together and send them on a honeymoon to remember,
a Bon-Voyage party by Email with gifts for both genders.
TheBigDay.com is where the registry can be found,
log on to the website and take a look around.
Our collective contributions will add to their fun,
or simply give them an extra day in the sun.
Our assistance will help with their flight or rental car,
kayaking, windsurfing, or drinks at the bar.
Champagne breakfast, a luau, or beach bar-b-que,
or an evening dinner cruise with a sunset view.
Since we won't be in attendance we can all be a part
Karen and Gene
will appreciate our thoughtful gifts from the heart."
Very cute, and it gets the point across. I think once people realize everything costs money on a trip, they'll be more willing to help out. I love how the sister threw in actual things they can do with the money, instead of just saying it'll help them a lot.
I really think it's a cute idea. It would be a neat way to get some of the things that we need anyway (like sturdy luggage, good beach towels, stuff to do the days we are at sea, maybe a pineapple slicer?) but it will help us out beforehand (getting luggage as a wedding gift we will open after we return doesn't really help us!)
As for the lingerie theme, I think we will save that one for the bachelorette party. The difficulty in planning that one is that my sister isn't old enough to drink, so we can't really barhop, which is fine by me, since I'm more of a dedicated bar girl than a hopper. What we can do is go to a nice dinner and have drinks there, then go home and do the lingerie/pajama/girly stuff in the privacy of our own home. Of course, we can all drink there, too, without worrying about being carded. I'm trying to think of what else people do at bachelorette parties that don't involve strip clubs or entire nights at bars. I'm open to suggestions, people!
One of the things I've read about lately and thought would be a neat idea is a honeymoon shower. Especially since I think we're doing a couples shower instead of ladies-only, it's not fair that most of the things we would get would be cutesy, girly things.
A honeymoon shower is also the perfect place to mention a honeymoon registry, too. I've seen testimonials of many a couple who could not have gone where they did and done what they did without the help of cash, cleverly disguised in a honeymoon registry.
While I know it's taboo to solicit gifts, because it's really all about the family and friends celebrating together, those who do want to mention something about gifts are faced with the difficulty of being tasteful about it. I came across this poem the other day, written by the bride's sister, explaining the honeymoon registry concept, and smoothly linking to the couple's own. The way it was worded, I don't think anyone would be offended.
From http://www.thebigday.com/help/KarenGenePoem.asp
It reads:
"Karen and Gene are planning to tie the knot,
off to Maui they'll go, but invited we're not.
The couple's sunset nuptials will come true
On Saturday, the 26th of October, 2002.
Per their request, no parties or showers and that's no lie,
but Karen's big sister, Debbie, would not comply.
Let's join together and send them on a honeymoon to remember,
a Bon-Voyage party by Email with gifts for both genders.
TheBigDay.com is where the registry can be found,
log on to the website and take a look around.
Our collective contributions will add to their fun,
or simply give them an extra day in the sun.
Our assistance will help with their flight or rental car,
kayaking, windsurfing, or drinks at the bar.
Champagne breakfast, a luau, or beach bar-b-que,
or an evening dinner cruise with a sunset view.
Since we won't be in attendance we can all be a part
Karen and Gene
will appreciate our thoughtful gifts from the heart."
Very cute, and it gets the point across. I think once people realize everything costs money on a trip, they'll be more willing to help out. I love how the sister threw in actual things they can do with the money, instead of just saying it'll help them a lot.
I really think it's a cute idea. It would be a neat way to get some of the things that we need anyway (like sturdy luggage, good beach towels, stuff to do the days we are at sea, maybe a pineapple slicer?) but it will help us out beforehand (getting luggage as a wedding gift we will open after we return doesn't really help us!)
As for the lingerie theme, I think we will save that one for the bachelorette party. The difficulty in planning that one is that my sister isn't old enough to drink, so we can't really barhop, which is fine by me, since I'm more of a dedicated bar girl than a hopper. What we can do is go to a nice dinner and have drinks there, then go home and do the lingerie/pajama/girly stuff in the privacy of our own home. Of course, we can all drink there, too, without worrying about being carded. I'm trying to think of what else people do at bachelorette parties that don't involve strip clubs or entire nights at bars. I'm open to suggestions, people!
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Four on the floor
Four months from right this moment, Jason and I will be on our way to the hotel to celebrate our wedding night!
Getting carded
I'm determined to do some more craft projects for my wedding. There are so many things out there that are way overpriced, just because they have the word "wedding" in their name. So many things are so simple, yet brides stress themselves trying to be too perfect. Plus, the more projects i do myself, the more our wedding has a personal feel to it.
I present to you my latest project, that took little time and few supplies. I'm going to use it at the wedding so guests who bring cards can have a safe place to put them without worrying about someone stuffing all that cash and gift-cardness into a jacket and walking out the door.
Step one: Find a box. Any old box will do, so long as it's big enough to hold all your cards.
Step two: Using a pair of scissors, or an exacto knife, carefully cut the two smaller flaps off of the box. I left just a bit of flap to keep it sturdier, and if you really want to be frugal and use the box again, you can just tape down the flaps inside the box (make sure to tape really well because if the flaps pop up the cards may not fit.
Step three: Tape the box closed. Make sure you really tape everything well, especially around the perimeter. Don't worry so much about the middle seam where the big flaps join, because it won't matter in a minute.
Step four: Using an exacto knife (or in my case, a large kitchen knife) cut a strip out of the middle of the top where the big flaps meet. Make the strip long enough that big wedding cards will fit, and thick enough that cards stuffed with something in them won't get stuck.
Step five: Wrap the entire box in wrapping paper. I used old paper I had lying around from a wedding a long time ago. That way, it blends in with the other gifts in their pretty wrapping. You could also get creative and use gift wrap in your wedding colors, or some other type of paper (recycled paper for a green wedding, newspaper for an editor-in-chief bride, etc.)
Step six: Using the knife again, cut the wrapping paper so the strip in the box is visible. A hint here is not to remove the paper that you cut, but instead wrap in along the flap and tape it into the underside of the box, so that you can't see the brown color of the cardboard underneath.
Step seven (optional): Add a matching bow for a little something extra.
P.S. - sorry about the unmade bed!
I present to you my latest project, that took little time and few supplies. I'm going to use it at the wedding so guests who bring cards can have a safe place to put them without worrying about someone stuffing all that cash and gift-cardness into a jacket and walking out the door.
Step one: Find a box. Any old box will do, so long as it's big enough to hold all your cards.
Step two: Using a pair of scissors, or an exacto knife, carefully cut the two smaller flaps off of the box. I left just a bit of flap to keep it sturdier, and if you really want to be frugal and use the box again, you can just tape down the flaps inside the box (make sure to tape really well because if the flaps pop up the cards may not fit.
Step three: Tape the box closed. Make sure you really tape everything well, especially around the perimeter. Don't worry so much about the middle seam where the big flaps join, because it won't matter in a minute.
Step four: Using an exacto knife (or in my case, a large kitchen knife) cut a strip out of the middle of the top where the big flaps meet. Make the strip long enough that big wedding cards will fit, and thick enough that cards stuffed with something in them won't get stuck.
Step five: Wrap the entire box in wrapping paper. I used old paper I had lying around from a wedding a long time ago. That way, it blends in with the other gifts in their pretty wrapping. You could also get creative and use gift wrap in your wedding colors, or some other type of paper (recycled paper for a green wedding, newspaper for an editor-in-chief bride, etc.)
Step six: Using the knife again, cut the wrapping paper so the strip in the box is visible. A hint here is not to remove the paper that you cut, but instead wrap in along the flap and tape it into the underside of the box, so that you can't see the brown color of the cardboard underneath.
Step seven (optional): Add a matching bow for a little something extra.
P.S. - sorry about the unmade bed!
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Ch-ch-changes
One of the things that's most shocking to me as I look back on my life is how my sister is now my best friend. Growing up, maybe it was just too much time spent together, forced to get along on too many family outings, that shook up our relationship. I had a friend in high school that I was so jealous of, because her best friends were here younger sister (a sophomore our senior year) and her younger brother (not yet in high school) and it always made me wonder about the "picture perfect family" that she must go home to every night. To be honest, they are an amazing family, and you can see their love for each other even after just a few minutes with them.
My sister and I fought all the time. Most of it was verbal - throwing insults, screaming matches, saying really hurtful things that we really didn't mean. And then there were the occasional instances where it got physical - biting, scratching, hitting (she swears up and down I broke a phone when I hit her with it; while I don't remember that I do remember covering her head with a pillow and then sitting on it.) Finally, my mom quit trying to referree and just let us go at it. My poor dad got more calls at work from one or the other of us crying about something. We were just plain awful. The few times we managed to get along great were more often than not ended on a sour note. Yes, I will take the blame for a lot of it happening. My teenage hormones, coupled with the difficulty of my parents' divorce (though now I see it as a blessing in disguise) made me a really unpleasant person to be around, at home if not with friends.
Now, things have changed. We call, we email, we chat online every time our schedules match up. When I go home to visit, I'm excited to see her and to do things with her, even if that thing we do is nothing. Every now and then, we get exasperated with each other (we've grown up to be two very different individuals) but deep down, we have such a fierce love for each other it make the trivial stuff, well, trivial.
Of course, everyone loves friends. Especially best friends. And what could be better than a best friend? How about TWO best friends! And what am I gaining when I walk down the aisle (besides an amazing husband?) A sister-in-law. Another girl, who even lives in the same city, that I can share things with, talk with, commisserate with. Right? Wrong.
Here's the problem: Jason and his sister aren't close. They're not best friends. It's not that they don't love each other, or even dislike each other. They just don't have the same close relationship Chelsea and I do. And what makes it hard for me is trying to find my boundary in all of this. I feel like, in fairness to Jason, I shouldn't be closer to her than he is. Because after all, she's only my sister IN LAW.
Sometimes I feel like I pressure him too much to call his sister, see what she's doing, see if she's free, if she wants to hang out. We have a wonderful time when we finally do manage to make plans, but those times are few and far between due to 4 very different, very hectic schedules.
I'm stuck in a veritable tango - take the initiative to adventure with her and overstep my boundaries, or back off for Jason's sake and potentially lose a great friend. I really want a great relationship with Jason's family (and I have it with most everyone from parents to grandparents) but I don't want it at the expense of his own relationships!
There are times when she makes effort towards me as a friend - like the fact that after we got engaged she let me borrow/have a lot of the wedding stuff she still had from her wedding last August. And the fact that I am borrowing her veil and headpiece to wear on my wedding day. There have been times where she and her husband have invited us out to dinner, or even over to their house for a cookout. While she and I aren't to the point of calling each other directly, we definitely aren't at ground zero.
What's the best way to approach this, to let my relationship with her blossom, without offending Jason or making him out to be a bad brother because I'm more involved with her than he is? I really hope we can have the type of relationship that Jason has with my sister, the type where alone in a room the two of them wouldn't sit in an awkward silence or make small talk. My sister loves Jason, and in his own way, Jason loves her. I want to love Jason's sister, too, but not at the expense of Jason's own love for her.
My sister and I fought all the time. Most of it was verbal - throwing insults, screaming matches, saying really hurtful things that we really didn't mean. And then there were the occasional instances where it got physical - biting, scratching, hitting (she swears up and down I broke a phone when I hit her with it; while I don't remember that I do remember covering her head with a pillow and then sitting on it.) Finally, my mom quit trying to referree and just let us go at it. My poor dad got more calls at work from one or the other of us crying about something. We were just plain awful. The few times we managed to get along great were more often than not ended on a sour note. Yes, I will take the blame for a lot of it happening. My teenage hormones, coupled with the difficulty of my parents' divorce (though now I see it as a blessing in disguise) made me a really unpleasant person to be around, at home if not with friends.
Now, things have changed. We call, we email, we chat online every time our schedules match up. When I go home to visit, I'm excited to see her and to do things with her, even if that thing we do is nothing. Every now and then, we get exasperated with each other (we've grown up to be two very different individuals) but deep down, we have such a fierce love for each other it make the trivial stuff, well, trivial.
Of course, everyone loves friends. Especially best friends. And what could be better than a best friend? How about TWO best friends! And what am I gaining when I walk down the aisle (besides an amazing husband?) A sister-in-law. Another girl, who even lives in the same city, that I can share things with, talk with, commisserate with. Right? Wrong.
Here's the problem: Jason and his sister aren't close. They're not best friends. It's not that they don't love each other, or even dislike each other. They just don't have the same close relationship Chelsea and I do. And what makes it hard for me is trying to find my boundary in all of this. I feel like, in fairness to Jason, I shouldn't be closer to her than he is. Because after all, she's only my sister IN LAW.
Sometimes I feel like I pressure him too much to call his sister, see what she's doing, see if she's free, if she wants to hang out. We have a wonderful time when we finally do manage to make plans, but those times are few and far between due to 4 very different, very hectic schedules.
I'm stuck in a veritable tango - take the initiative to adventure with her and overstep my boundaries, or back off for Jason's sake and potentially lose a great friend. I really want a great relationship with Jason's family (and I have it with most everyone from parents to grandparents) but I don't want it at the expense of his own relationships!
There are times when she makes effort towards me as a friend - like the fact that after we got engaged she let me borrow/have a lot of the wedding stuff she still had from her wedding last August. And the fact that I am borrowing her veil and headpiece to wear on my wedding day. There have been times where she and her husband have invited us out to dinner, or even over to their house for a cookout. While she and I aren't to the point of calling each other directly, we definitely aren't at ground zero.
What's the best way to approach this, to let my relationship with her blossom, without offending Jason or making him out to be a bad brother because I'm more involved with her than he is? I really hope we can have the type of relationship that Jason has with my sister, the type where alone in a room the two of them wouldn't sit in an awkward silence or make small talk. My sister loves Jason, and in his own way, Jason loves her. I want to love Jason's sister, too, but not at the expense of Jason's own love for her.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Keeping costs low
It's no secret that Jason and I are paying for 95% of our wedding, The only things we're not paying for are the rehearsal dinner, my dress and alterations, and things typically covered by the wedding party like their outfits and travel. Everything else rests upon our shoulders. And our credit cards. Gotta love that 0% APR.
Awhile back, Jason and I were looking at buying a house. We spent an entire day with our realtor (friend of his family) and played around with a bunch of different financing options. In the end, we decided that paying for a wedding while I still didn't have a full-time job (I still don't) and trying to pay a mortgage was just too much financial strain. So we signed a lease for another year in our apartment.
During the house hunt, I talked to my mom, who said she thought buying a house was a better investment than having a lavish wedding. But I don't think our wedding is going to be lavish. I think words that more appropriately describe our wedding are intimate, modest and beautiful. Of course, any wedding is beautiful, so that's a given.
I got to thinking of the way we are keeping costs down, and while some people may be shocked by what we are/aren't doing, we're only looking to celebrate with our friends and family, not receive any type of awards or win any contests. Here are some of the ways we are making it work, to make it wonderful:
1. We are not eating on fine china. There will be no polished silver, no crystal goblets. Not only is our venue too country-charming for that stuffy elegance, it's just silly to spend so much for getting so little (not only was the china service an outrageous expense per person, we would have to hire additional staff to bus tables, as well as people to spend the entire night in the kitchen, washing dishes.) This ties in with point two.
2. Our caterering is untraditional. Yes, there will good food served at the wedding, and plenty of it, but don't expect caviar and pate or a six-course whirlwind. Expect home cookin. Comfort food rather than aesthetic food that tastes like cardboard. As a bonus, our caterer will also be cutting and serving the cake, and pouring and serving champagne for the toast (this ties back in with point one - they couldn't do that stuff if they were stuck washing dishes. Thus, we get more for our money in the end.)
3. Champagne is the only liquor that we will have at the wedding, for the toasts. We want our wedding to be a celebration, not a room full of drunk people. Especially since everyone will be driving home that night, it's something we don't want to risk. So we will have champagne, which people are welcome to drink (until it's gone) and anyone who needs more liquor than that can go out and experience Fort Worth nightlife on their own time (and their own tab!)
4. I'm a great bargain hunter. We have hoarded Michaels' coupons, gone completely out of our way, kept track of upcoming sales, and smooth-talked our way into getting some really great bargains. Online shopping is a wedding Godsend - especially eBay and Netbride. Craigslist was another helpful site, as was just doing general Google searches. The key factor is shopping around. Though we may have gone with the first vendor we met with from a certain category, it certainly wasn't the only meeting we had. We met with two of at least every kind of company, and some we had contact with as many as a dozen!
The point is, it can be done. Given a limitless budget, I can't say I'd choose all the same things anyway. But I can't say I won't be happy with everything that we will have. Because, in the end, what we have is better than anything money could ever buy.
Awhile back, Jason and I were looking at buying a house. We spent an entire day with our realtor (friend of his family) and played around with a bunch of different financing options. In the end, we decided that paying for a wedding while I still didn't have a full-time job (I still don't) and trying to pay a mortgage was just too much financial strain. So we signed a lease for another year in our apartment.
During the house hunt, I talked to my mom, who said she thought buying a house was a better investment than having a lavish wedding. But I don't think our wedding is going to be lavish. I think words that more appropriately describe our wedding are intimate, modest and beautiful. Of course, any wedding is beautiful, so that's a given.
I got to thinking of the way we are keeping costs down, and while some people may be shocked by what we are/aren't doing, we're only looking to celebrate with our friends and family, not receive any type of awards or win any contests. Here are some of the ways we are making it work, to make it wonderful:
1. We are not eating on fine china. There will be no polished silver, no crystal goblets. Not only is our venue too country-charming for that stuffy elegance, it's just silly to spend so much for getting so little (not only was the china service an outrageous expense per person, we would have to hire additional staff to bus tables, as well as people to spend the entire night in the kitchen, washing dishes.) This ties in with point two.
2. Our caterering is untraditional. Yes, there will good food served at the wedding, and plenty of it, but don't expect caviar and pate or a six-course whirlwind. Expect home cookin. Comfort food rather than aesthetic food that tastes like cardboard. As a bonus, our caterer will also be cutting and serving the cake, and pouring and serving champagne for the toast (this ties back in with point one - they couldn't do that stuff if they were stuck washing dishes. Thus, we get more for our money in the end.)
3. Champagne is the only liquor that we will have at the wedding, for the toasts. We want our wedding to be a celebration, not a room full of drunk people. Especially since everyone will be driving home that night, it's something we don't want to risk. So we will have champagne, which people are welcome to drink (until it's gone) and anyone who needs more liquor than that can go out and experience Fort Worth nightlife on their own time (and their own tab!)
4. I'm a great bargain hunter. We have hoarded Michaels' coupons, gone completely out of our way, kept track of upcoming sales, and smooth-talked our way into getting some really great bargains. Online shopping is a wedding Godsend - especially eBay and Netbride. Craigslist was another helpful site, as was just doing general Google searches. The key factor is shopping around. Though we may have gone with the first vendor we met with from a certain category, it certainly wasn't the only meeting we had. We met with two of at least every kind of company, and some we had contact with as many as a dozen!
The point is, it can be done. Given a limitless budget, I can't say I'd choose all the same things anyway. But I can't say I won't be happy with everything that we will have. Because, in the end, what we have is better than anything money could ever buy.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
To the lists!
I'd like to think I'm a very organized person. It's only about 80% true. While the majority of my life is relatively orderly, there are the occasional incidents where I think to myself "I really should sort this out." The fact that Jason and I are attempting to coordinate this wedding entirely by ourselves means that there's not any room for being absentminded or scatterbrained. So I have been making lists like crazy, and it's even starting to bleed over into other aspects of my life (which, in the end, is a good thing!)
This week, I made a master checklist. This four page beauty (double columns on every page) has everything I can think of that I will need from now until we return on our honeymoon on October 28. We are talking what to bring to hair trials, beauty appointments, portrait sessions, various family events, the wedding (broken down into chapel, reception room and other) as well as a complete packing list for our honeymoon cruise (more on that soon.) I'm sure that this list isn't complete, but now when I randomly think of something while in the grocery store I can come home and have a designated place to put it so it can be safe and sound with all of its catergorized buddies.
Last night and tonight, I have been working on a list of photos that I want to make sure our photographer knows to get. I even arranged them according to the order they should be taken in (grandparents first, then siblings, then parents, then just us - that way once a group is done they're completely done and can leave and quit being distracting.) As if that weren't compulsive enough, I then went back and COLOR CODED each item to fit into one of six subcategories (Jason's family, my dad's side, my mom's side, just Jason and me, the wedding party, and everything else.)
On my computer desk right now I have four additional running lists. These include two different lists involving price/quantity breakdowns for something still in the works (can you say "top secret") as well as a list of all the things I want to blog about (all of a sudden came up with a bunch of things but don't want to tackle them all at once.) Lastly I have my grocery list in progress (which used to be kept on our dry erase board on the fridge, but then I had to write it down a second time so I could take the list with me, so I eliminated a step.)
Another big list I made this week was a breakdown of the shore excursions we can go on in each of the ports of call on our cruise. I've been talking to Jason and have now deleted anything that we don't both want to do. So now I can go back in a few weeks, read over them and pick the best one without having to weed out the junk again.
Of course, the ultimate list is my Knot checklist. Today we found a sale going on at Party City, so we bought all of the glasses for the champagne toast. Another one down. We still have yet to buy all of the dinnerware (which, by the way, will not be fine china, so prepare yourselves now - don't worry, it's not paper plates, either) because I want to coordinate with my caterer so the stuff she's bringing and the stuff we're bringing go together at least.
Look at that. What I just said has prompted me to add another item to one of my lists. I guess the visual side of me is really going to come out, which is fine, because it's such a WONDERFUL feeling seeing another checkmark, another item crossed off, or even another document created (which leads to being able to check something else off.)
Now if only this organization could bleed over into things like keeping the apartment clean, finishing laundry the same day I start it, or keeping my car clutter free!
This week, I made a master checklist. This four page beauty (double columns on every page) has everything I can think of that I will need from now until we return on our honeymoon on October 28. We are talking what to bring to hair trials, beauty appointments, portrait sessions, various family events, the wedding (broken down into chapel, reception room and other) as well as a complete packing list for our honeymoon cruise (more on that soon.) I'm sure that this list isn't complete, but now when I randomly think of something while in the grocery store I can come home and have a designated place to put it so it can be safe and sound with all of its catergorized buddies.
Last night and tonight, I have been working on a list of photos that I want to make sure our photographer knows to get. I even arranged them according to the order they should be taken in (grandparents first, then siblings, then parents, then just us - that way once a group is done they're completely done and can leave and quit being distracting.) As if that weren't compulsive enough, I then went back and COLOR CODED each item to fit into one of six subcategories (Jason's family, my dad's side, my mom's side, just Jason and me, the wedding party, and everything else.)
On my computer desk right now I have four additional running lists. These include two different lists involving price/quantity breakdowns for something still in the works (can you say "top secret") as well as a list of all the things I want to blog about (all of a sudden came up with a bunch of things but don't want to tackle them all at once.) Lastly I have my grocery list in progress (which used to be kept on our dry erase board on the fridge, but then I had to write it down a second time so I could take the list with me, so I eliminated a step.)
Another big list I made this week was a breakdown of the shore excursions we can go on in each of the ports of call on our cruise. I've been talking to Jason and have now deleted anything that we don't both want to do. So now I can go back in a few weeks, read over them and pick the best one without having to weed out the junk again.
Of course, the ultimate list is my Knot checklist. Today we found a sale going on at Party City, so we bought all of the glasses for the champagne toast. Another one down. We still have yet to buy all of the dinnerware (which, by the way, will not be fine china, so prepare yourselves now - don't worry, it's not paper plates, either) because I want to coordinate with my caterer so the stuff she's bringing and the stuff we're bringing go together at least.
Look at that. What I just said has prompted me to add another item to one of my lists. I guess the visual side of me is really going to come out, which is fine, because it's such a WONDERFUL feeling seeing another checkmark, another item crossed off, or even another document created (which leads to being able to check something else off.)
Now if only this organization could bleed over into things like keeping the apartment clean, finishing laundry the same day I start it, or keeping my car clutter free!
Friday, June 15, 2007
My first (and only) hair trial
This afternoon I met with a lovely woman named Deborah who lives in the town next to where we are getting married. I brought in about 30 pictures of different hair ideas that I liked and we played around for a few hours. Here is what we came up with:
Me before. I didn't notice how long my hair was getting until I saw this. Deborah also leases a salon and so she's going to meet with me in September to trim it and add some layers. That way she can get it how she thinks it will work best for my hairdo.
And now, with no further adieu...
Side view. I really like the side sweep thing. It gives a little more to look at than a bland forehead. Also, it helps draw attention from my very Jewish nose!
You can see my industrial piercing in this one. I think I will wind up taking out for the actual wedding day. Maybe find little sparkly things to put in instead. Or nothing at all. I haven't decided yet.
Close up of the curls and the placement of the veil. She lifted the hair to insert the veil comb, so if I decide to take the veil out for the reception (I'm thinking I will) it won't mess up the style itself.
Artsy-poetic picture. Mom approves, and so do I. Of course, we will do something similar once I'm actually in the big white dress.
Sorry for the poor picture qualty. It was way darker originally and I auto-fixed it so it would lighten enough to be able to see me. I think I may have the sweep come down a little lower at the top. What do you guys think?
Me before. I didn't notice how long my hair was getting until I saw this. Deborah also leases a salon and so she's going to meet with me in September to trim it and add some layers. That way she can get it how she thinks it will work best for my hairdo.And now, with no further adieu...
Side view. I really like the side sweep thing. It gives a little more to look at than a bland forehead. Also, it helps draw attention from my very Jewish nose!
You can see my industrial piercing in this one. I think I will wind up taking out for the actual wedding day. Maybe find little sparkly things to put in instead. Or nothing at all. I haven't decided yet.
Close up of the curls and the placement of the veil. She lifted the hair to insert the veil comb, so if I decide to take the veil out for the reception (I'm thinking I will) it won't mess up the style itself.
Artsy-poetic picture. Mom approves, and so do I. Of course, we will do something similar once I'm actually in the big white dress.
Sorry for the poor picture qualty. It was way darker originally and I auto-fixed it so it would lighten enough to be able to see me. I think I may have the sweep come down a little lower at the top. What do you guys think?
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Crunching numbers
Let's talk numbers, shall we? In no order of importance, but in increasing value (because I have to have some kind of order) I present to you the following:
1 - The One. You know, that guy I'm marrying.
2 - The number of fabulous ladies that are my bridesmaids.
3 - The number of kids I want to have (2 of my own and 1 adopted)
4 - The number of shore excursions that even look remotely interesting in Grand Cayman. Maybe this will be the day we just walk/shop/lounge around and don't do any paid activities.
8 - The total number of days we will be participating in our wonderful honeymoon cruise.
77 - To-do items left on my list. In my defense, the only thing I'm overdue on is the rehearsal dinner stuff (which isn't a surprise and hopefully will be taken care of this weekend) and mind you 17 of them are either due the day before or the day of the wedding
128 - DAYS UNTIL THE WEDDING!!!
129 - Days to the honeymoon, naturally.
130 - The perfect number of guests to have so the reception room isn't overly crowded.
150 - How much they want us to pay to swim with dolphins.
1,000,000 - How much money I wish I had, how many thank you notes I will have to write, and the number of times happier I will be once I marry my best friend. Awww!
1 - The One. You know, that guy I'm marrying.
2 - The number of fabulous ladies that are my bridesmaids.
3 - The number of kids I want to have (2 of my own and 1 adopted)
4 - The number of shore excursions that even look remotely interesting in Grand Cayman. Maybe this will be the day we just walk/shop/lounge around and don't do any paid activities.
8 - The total number of days we will be participating in our wonderful honeymoon cruise.
77 - To-do items left on my list. In my defense, the only thing I'm overdue on is the rehearsal dinner stuff (which isn't a surprise and hopefully will be taken care of this weekend) and mind you 17 of them are either due the day before or the day of the wedding
128 - DAYS UNTIL THE WEDDING!!!
129 - Days to the honeymoon, naturally.
130 - The perfect number of guests to have so the reception room isn't overly crowded.
150 - How much they want us to pay to swim with dolphins.
1,000,000 - How much money I wish I had, how many thank you notes I will have to write, and the number of times happier I will be once I marry my best friend. Awww!
Monday, June 11, 2007
I promise
The wedding on Saturday was wonderful. Congratulations to Lauren and David on a beautiful marriage and an amazing reception. While my part was pretty insignificant (the thrill being running downstairs to grab the toss bouquet and running it back upstairs) I still learned a lot about wedding planning in general, and have taken a lot with me as I keep pushing for our own wedding.
Yesterday I made a master checklist of everything to pack, from the bridal portrait to the honeymoon, I've got four pages of double-columned items to not forget. I'm sure I'll be adding to the list in the next few months.
We also crossed a huge item off our list because we sat down and wrote our wedding vows! They're a little untraditional, in that they're not going to be "I promise to do this and this and never do this and always do this" but they will be beautiful and meaningful nonetheless.
I have an appointment/consultation scheduled on Friday with a lady who has had 30 years experience doing hair and makeup. She's really sweet, and just up the road, both from us and the Abbey. Her son even got married at the Abbey, so she's definitely had experience with the things we will be dealing with come wedding day. Her prices are really reasonable, too. I hope everything goes well and I can book her on the spot. Now I just have to gather pictures of what I think I want my hair to look like so I can give her an idea.
This morning I was on call at work and they didn't need me, so I've been home trying to do little odd jobs that need doing for the wedding. So I assembled centerpieces. 17 wreaths were painstakingly put together, each one following a distinct pattern so that they were all uniform in appearance and size. My fingers hurt now. But it's one less thing to do come October.
There are a few things I still haven't figured out, like the rehearsal dinner and accompanying invites. Justin, Texas just isn't a hoppin place for good food. I don't even know if they have a restaurant in the town... Of course, this also means I haven't been able to design invites to said rehearsal dinner. Maybe I'll just make them the same as the wedding ones, since we have a whole lot more of them than we need. But I'd like to make them cute/different, so we'll see.
The thing that I'm most puzzled about is the seating plan for the reception. Originally, we weren't going to have a seating plan, but space is so tight at our venue that if we don't delegate who sits with who we could wind up with single empty chairs at each table, forcing a family to break up and sit alone at a table of people they don't really know. So now I have to come up with a cute idea for telling everyone where they'll be sitting. Of course, I can't even begin to think about it until I know who is coming and who isn't. I did sit down the other day and arrange tables assuming every single person we invited is coming, but even that's not realistic because one family that declines means rearranging it all again. At least I know it can be done. I think.
Yesterday I made a master checklist of everything to pack, from the bridal portrait to the honeymoon, I've got four pages of double-columned items to not forget. I'm sure I'll be adding to the list in the next few months.
We also crossed a huge item off our list because we sat down and wrote our wedding vows! They're a little untraditional, in that they're not going to be "I promise to do this and this and never do this and always do this" but they will be beautiful and meaningful nonetheless.
I have an appointment/consultation scheduled on Friday with a lady who has had 30 years experience doing hair and makeup. She's really sweet, and just up the road, both from us and the Abbey. Her son even got married at the Abbey, so she's definitely had experience with the things we will be dealing with come wedding day. Her prices are really reasonable, too. I hope everything goes well and I can book her on the spot. Now I just have to gather pictures of what I think I want my hair to look like so I can give her an idea.
This morning I was on call at work and they didn't need me, so I've been home trying to do little odd jobs that need doing for the wedding. So I assembled centerpieces. 17 wreaths were painstakingly put together, each one following a distinct pattern so that they were all uniform in appearance and size. My fingers hurt now. But it's one less thing to do come October.
There are a few things I still haven't figured out, like the rehearsal dinner and accompanying invites. Justin, Texas just isn't a hoppin place for good food. I don't even know if they have a restaurant in the town... Of course, this also means I haven't been able to design invites to said rehearsal dinner. Maybe I'll just make them the same as the wedding ones, since we have a whole lot more of them than we need. But I'd like to make them cute/different, so we'll see.
The thing that I'm most puzzled about is the seating plan for the reception. Originally, we weren't going to have a seating plan, but space is so tight at our venue that if we don't delegate who sits with who we could wind up with single empty chairs at each table, forcing a family to break up and sit alone at a table of people they don't really know. So now I have to come up with a cute idea for telling everyone where they'll be sitting. Of course, I can't even begin to think about it until I know who is coming and who isn't. I did sit down the other day and arrange tables assuming every single person we invited is coming, but even that's not realistic because one family that declines means rearranging it all again. At least I know it can be done. I think.
Friday, June 8, 2007
Eeee!
Recently, I've been in touch with the company that I ordered our dresses through, netbride.com. I'm trying to figure out exactly when our dresses will be coming in so that I can have a plan in place in terms of alterations. It turns out that even though I bought a brand new Alfred Angelo dress, Alfred Angelo won't alter it for me because I didn't purchase directly from them. So now I'm stuck looking for someone to alter my dress, and I still don't even know when! Netbride originally said that the outside date I would get the dresses would be absolutely no later than August 18th, which still gives me a month for alterations, but I know that's not much time at all. When I emailed them the other day, Laura said that they are expecting the dresses to come earlier, but to keep the 18th as the outside date still. She said that once it's on its way to me they will let me know and provide a UPS tracking number so that I know exactly what's going on. I guess AA sends them the dress first and then they send it on to me.
Other things I'm trying to work out now are hair and makeup, as well as my bridal portraits. The thing is, I haven't gotten anything done to my hair since before I moved to Fort Worth. We're talking six months without so much as a hair cut! I literally have no experience with anyone in this city when it comes to my hair.
I guess I should look around for people in this area who do hair, but I've only ever gone to a place like Supercuts, or a friend of my mom's who doesn't have a whole lot of skill with updos. Plus, it's not like I have the money to play around with a million different hairstyles at a dozen different appointments. I kind of need to find someone soon, but don't really know where to look. I don't think the women in Jason's family have specific hairdressers, either.
That brings me to makeup. The only time I've ever had my makeup "done" was when I was dating a guy whose mom worked at Estee Lauder. She did it a few times for things like homecoming and formals, but that was 5 years ago and she's in Houston. Ideally, I'd like to find someone that does hair and makeup that can come to us on the wedding day so we don't have to be driving all over the place. Factor that into my budget.
Finally, the bridal portraits. Beautiful pictures taken of the bride in her nuptial best to be displayed at the reception for everyone to "ooh" and "ahh" over. Many brides use the portrait as a way to test out different things - hair, makeup, jewelry, flowers - so that they have time to make any necessary changes before the show - a dress rehearsal, if you will. Problem with that is what if I do change my mind about things? Then we have lovely portraits of K.C. looking nothing like she does at the wedding. People will be going "does she have a twin?" And then someone like Jason can say "no, she's just being her usual indecisive self!" Thanks for pointing that out, honey.
Which brings me back to the dress. I can't very well schedule alterations until I know when the dress will be in, and I can't schedule my portraits until I know alterations will be done. Obviously, this all needs to take place before the wedding itself, with enough time in between for Larry our photographer to be able to print us a beautiful copy of the portrait for display at the wedding.
ANXIOUS++
Other things I'm trying to work out now are hair and makeup, as well as my bridal portraits. The thing is, I haven't gotten anything done to my hair since before I moved to Fort Worth. We're talking six months without so much as a hair cut! I literally have no experience with anyone in this city when it comes to my hair.
I guess I should look around for people in this area who do hair, but I've only ever gone to a place like Supercuts, or a friend of my mom's who doesn't have a whole lot of skill with updos. Plus, it's not like I have the money to play around with a million different hairstyles at a dozen different appointments. I kind of need to find someone soon, but don't really know where to look. I don't think the women in Jason's family have specific hairdressers, either.
That brings me to makeup. The only time I've ever had my makeup "done" was when I was dating a guy whose mom worked at Estee Lauder. She did it a few times for things like homecoming and formals, but that was 5 years ago and she's in Houston. Ideally, I'd like to find someone that does hair and makeup that can come to us on the wedding day so we don't have to be driving all over the place. Factor that into my budget.
Finally, the bridal portraits. Beautiful pictures taken of the bride in her nuptial best to be displayed at the reception for everyone to "ooh" and "ahh" over. Many brides use the portrait as a way to test out different things - hair, makeup, jewelry, flowers - so that they have time to make any necessary changes before the show - a dress rehearsal, if you will. Problem with that is what if I do change my mind about things? Then we have lovely portraits of K.C. looking nothing like she does at the wedding. People will be going "does she have a twin?" And then someone like Jason can say "no, she's just being her usual indecisive self!" Thanks for pointing that out, honey.
Which brings me back to the dress. I can't very well schedule alterations until I know when the dress will be in, and I can't schedule my portraits until I know alterations will be done. Obviously, this all needs to take place before the wedding itself, with enough time in between for Larry our photographer to be able to print us a beautiful copy of the portrait for display at the wedding.
ANXIOUS++
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Executive decision
This morning as I was running wedding errands, I got a phone call from Kay saying that the ring we had special ordered in all white gold for Jason had come in and that we could swing by to take a look and see what we thought.
I swung by before work to see it myself, since I had enough time to browse and not enough time to go home between what I was doing and when I had to be at the BN. I also got my engagement ring cleaned, and tried on the two rings that were my top contenders - ring wraps with the only real different being the carat weight. Believe it or not, I chose the lesser weight because it makes my solitaire stand out more. The lovely ladies put the wrap in the safe with Jason's ring to make sure that no one would come in and buy it out from under me. Then I went to work. After work, Jason met me at the store and tried his ring on (it looked much better on his hand than it did on my thumb while I tried to imagine it on his ring finger!)
And... after filling out a credit card application so we could have 12 months to pay sans interest, we bought our wedding rings!!! I was so excited, I wore mine home. Sorry to anyone on 114 around 8pm that I might have almost hit because I was paying more attention to my ring than the road!
As a special treat, when Jason and I went to dinner tonight, we wore our rings! I know, I'm weak. But it's so pretty! We made a deal though, and now our rings are safe and sound in their boxes locked away in our floodproof/fireproof lockbox. Now I have to wait a whole 'nother 4.5 months before I can wear it again. I can always sneak a peek though, right?
As a side note, the restaurant we went to tonight is a top contender for the rehearsal dinner. By top contender, I mean we aren't totally opposed to having it there. So now I have to call in the morning to talk to the owner about reserving the patio and what types of food setups we can do - plated or buffet or everyone-order-from-the-menu.
I swung by before work to see it myself, since I had enough time to browse and not enough time to go home between what I was doing and when I had to be at the BN. I also got my engagement ring cleaned, and tried on the two rings that were my top contenders - ring wraps with the only real different being the carat weight. Believe it or not, I chose the lesser weight because it makes my solitaire stand out more. The lovely ladies put the wrap in the safe with Jason's ring to make sure that no one would come in and buy it out from under me. Then I went to work. After work, Jason met me at the store and tried his ring on (it looked much better on his hand than it did on my thumb while I tried to imagine it on his ring finger!)
And... after filling out a credit card application so we could have 12 months to pay sans interest, we bought our wedding rings!!! I was so excited, I wore mine home. Sorry to anyone on 114 around 8pm that I might have almost hit because I was paying more attention to my ring than the road!
As a special treat, when Jason and I went to dinner tonight, we wore our rings! I know, I'm weak. But it's so pretty! We made a deal though, and now our rings are safe and sound in their boxes locked away in our floodproof/fireproof lockbox. Now I have to wait a whole 'nother 4.5 months before I can wear it again. I can always sneak a peek though, right?
As a side note, the restaurant we went to tonight is a top contender for the rehearsal dinner. By top contender, I mean we aren't totally opposed to having it there. So now I have to call in the morning to talk to the owner about reserving the patio and what types of food setups we can do - plated or buffet or everyone-order-from-the-menu.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
But I don't have a black suit
Yesterday's wedding excitement has to do with shoes. White shoes. Bridal shoes. Long story short, I bought two pairs.
The first pair is a very basic white pump. Mine are similar, though not shiny patent leather.
The second one is more of a sandal with a closed toe (imagine it in white.) They're a little rounder at the toe because I have fat feet and think pointy shoes are hideously ugly!
I just got a whole bunch of email stuff about the wedding I'm working on Saturday. Yes, I said working. I'm going to try my hand in the wedding world. Right now, I'm a lowly intern, but if I like it and the company continues to grow, I could move up and up to head coordinator. The only problem is, I don't have a black suit. I have black slacks and assorted black tops, but no jacket. Yikes. Looks like I better go shopping before Saturday!
I'm excited to help make someone's wedding day that much better, and excited to see a wedding all come together (it will give me a boost of confidence) but at the same time, the biggest emotion I feel is:
The first pair is a very basic white pump. Mine are similar, though not shiny patent leather.
The second one is more of a sandal with a closed toe (imagine it in white.) They're a little rounder at the toe because I have fat feet and think pointy shoes are hideously ugly!I just got a whole bunch of email stuff about the wedding I'm working on Saturday. Yes, I said working. I'm going to try my hand in the wedding world. Right now, I'm a lowly intern, but if I like it and the company continues to grow, I could move up and up to head coordinator. The only problem is, I don't have a black suit. I have black slacks and assorted black tops, but no jacket. Yikes. Looks like I better go shopping before Saturday!
I'm excited to help make someone's wedding day that much better, and excited to see a wedding all come together (it will give me a boost of confidence) but at the same time, the biggest emotion I feel is:
Saturday, June 2, 2007
Every Kandace begins with K
Today was productive. After sleeping in until almost noon (!) we finally quit dragging our feet and headed out for an exciting day. Our first stop was Al's Formal Wear, where in about 30 minutes we had everything picked out for what all our handsome men will be wearing. The exception being my dad, but I'm going to let him choose what he wears to walk me down (within reason, and within the contraints of the rest of the wedding decor.) After putting a down payment on all three tuxes (because Jason is generous like that) they just need measurements from the guys and we are good to go until we pick everything up two days before the wedding.
This is what Thomas and Arthur will be wearing, except the tie will be solid purple. Jason will be wearing the same thing, but in all black. Everyone will have the same black jacket, pants and shoes, and the white wing-tip shirt with black/silver cufflinks. How dashing they'll all be!
After that productiveness, we headed over to the Zales outlet store to peruse wedding bands. [Note: here's where it gets tricky. I don't know how many of you know this, but Kandace is allergic to nickel. No, not the coins (which aren't even made of nickel!) The actual metal nickel. The metal that comprises a majority of jewelry out there - everything from ___-plated jewelry to various alloys, including white gold, contain varying degrees of nickel. For this reason, I don't have a college class ring. I'm not sure what the extent of my allergy is (the higher the karat of gold, the less nickel in the mix) but it was such an expensive investment to purchase the highest karat they offered (18) if I wasn't sure it would be pure enough.]
But that's not the main focus of this story. Jason was wonderful enough to purchase my engagement ring in platinum so that I might enjoy it for all our long years without redness, swelling, itching or scabbing (gross, sorry.) So when we went into Zales today we had a pretty clear idea of what we needed. They showed us some stuff both for me and for him, and it helped us decide even more what would work for us. I fell in love with ring wraps. Ring wraps are essentially enhancers that tack on to the engagement ring, making it look as though you are wearing one ornate ring. They come on a separate band, but have a gap in the middle so that your original stone "nests" inside, creating a unified piece.
After talking about pricing and various other details, we decided we weren't quite ready to drop that kind of money yet. We thanked the saleslady (who had the audacity to ask us if we were kidding when we said we didn't want to buy today, and then guilted us because she had already cut the tag - BFD!) and we headed out the door. Even if we decide to go with those choices from Zales, we will definitely be visiting a different person at a different location!
From Zales we headed to Kay Jewelers in Southlake Town Square. Three lovely ladies helped us patiently, throwing out ideas, making suggestions, giving opinions. Much better than Zales. I fell in love with a ring wrap there as well. I know it's perfect because while looking at the other options besides that one, I pointed to another one that I liked that was in a yellow gold - come to find out it was the same ring in two different golds! The only downside to this whole ordeal is that they're not sure they can get it for me in platinum. They are going to do some research, call their vendors and their craftsmen and see if they can have it cast in platinum for me.
Below are the pictures of the concept of ring wraps:
This is the exact wrap I want, but in platinum. Notice the wide gap in the middle and how it drops down lower than the back of the band. This ensures that the two pieces fit together and look like one solid ring.
This is what it would look like with my engagement ring in the middle. The thick sides help hide the fact that it's two different bands. Isn't it gorgeous???
Very similar to the one we are looking at for Jason.
Fingers crossed for good news on Monday!
This is what Thomas and Arthur will be wearing, except the tie will be solid purple. Jason will be wearing the same thing, but in all black. Everyone will have the same black jacket, pants and shoes, and the white wing-tip shirt with black/silver cufflinks. How dashing they'll all be!
After that productiveness, we headed over to the Zales outlet store to peruse wedding bands. [Note: here's where it gets tricky. I don't know how many of you know this, but Kandace is allergic to nickel. No, not the coins (which aren't even made of nickel!) The actual metal nickel. The metal that comprises a majority of jewelry out there - everything from ___-plated jewelry to various alloys, including white gold, contain varying degrees of nickel. For this reason, I don't have a college class ring. I'm not sure what the extent of my allergy is (the higher the karat of gold, the less nickel in the mix) but it was such an expensive investment to purchase the highest karat they offered (18) if I wasn't sure it would be pure enough.]
But that's not the main focus of this story. Jason was wonderful enough to purchase my engagement ring in platinum so that I might enjoy it for all our long years without redness, swelling, itching or scabbing (gross, sorry.) So when we went into Zales today we had a pretty clear idea of what we needed. They showed us some stuff both for me and for him, and it helped us decide even more what would work for us. I fell in love with ring wraps. Ring wraps are essentially enhancers that tack on to the engagement ring, making it look as though you are wearing one ornate ring. They come on a separate band, but have a gap in the middle so that your original stone "nests" inside, creating a unified piece.
After talking about pricing and various other details, we decided we weren't quite ready to drop that kind of money yet. We thanked the saleslady (who had the audacity to ask us if we were kidding when we said we didn't want to buy today, and then guilted us because she had already cut the tag - BFD!) and we headed out the door. Even if we decide to go with those choices from Zales, we will definitely be visiting a different person at a different location!
From Zales we headed to Kay Jewelers in Southlake Town Square. Three lovely ladies helped us patiently, throwing out ideas, making suggestions, giving opinions. Much better than Zales. I fell in love with a ring wrap there as well. I know it's perfect because while looking at the other options besides that one, I pointed to another one that I liked that was in a yellow gold - come to find out it was the same ring in two different golds! The only downside to this whole ordeal is that they're not sure they can get it for me in platinum. They are going to do some research, call their vendors and their craftsmen and see if they can have it cast in platinum for me.
Below are the pictures of the concept of ring wraps:
This is the exact wrap I want, but in platinum. Notice the wide gap in the middle and how it drops down lower than the back of the band. This ensures that the two pieces fit together and look like one solid ring.
This is what it would look like with my engagement ring in the middle. The thick sides help hide the fact that it's two different bands. Isn't it gorgeous???
Very similar to the one we are looking at for Jason.
Fingers crossed for good news on Monday!
Friday, June 1, 2007
Opposites attract
I just sent my sister a list of the women who are most important in my life. You know, the ones that I've deemed worthy of getting drunk with us while sending me into marriagedom. Let's just say I don't need even to take my socks off to count the number of girls on that list.
I know they say opposites attract, but isn't that supposed to just pertain to chemistry/romantic endeavors? Or does that hold true for all relationships regardless of their intimacy level? I guess I've always had more guy friends. Well, I've never been able to keep girlfriends is more like it. I think back to my "best friends" in my younger days and am sad to think of how many of them I've drifted far from. A lot of it was my fault. For some of them, I can name specific incidents that caused the rift that never got fully patched again. Sure, I'm still friends with all of these ladies, but I don't think we will ever be as close as we were then. If I ran into them in public we could talk and "catch up" but then what? No exchanging of new phone numbers, no future plans made (save for the vague mentioning of the fact we should get together some time) and then maybe a hasty online message via Facebook.
I wonder why it's so hard for me to befriend women and keep them close. It seems like someone always fails the relationship. When I was 8, it was my best friend who had moved away after living next door to me for years. She was coming to my birthday party and I hadn't seen her in some time. I was beside myself, looking out the window all the time, asking my mom when she would be there. I put my other friends on the back burner waiting for her to show. And she never did. And there was no phone call to say she wasn't coming. All I know is that I think my mom finally called her mom to see what traumatic event had caused her to not only not show, but not even bother to call. I believe the lame response had to do with which parent had custody of her that weekend. Or something equally pathetic. Maybe that was the first time I learned not to let myself get too close to a girlfriend if I didn't want to get hurt.
It goes on from there. Several altercations at various birthday parties, fighting on the school bus, name calling, preteen awkwardness and sensitive little girls all somehow made it clear that girls carry too much baggage. Even today, I love my female friends, but can only handle them alone in small doses. Even my sister, who is my best friend in the world, can get on my nerves pretty easily. Maybe there's some underlying competition going on. Who knows.
So my bachelorette party won't require the renting of a party bus or an entire floor of a hotel. But I like it that way. A handful of close friends is better than two dozen acquaintances that I might not even be friends with a year from now. My little baby sister will be the only one not legally able to drink, so we will either have to find a good 18+ club, or create Club Bride at home.
It's up to my wonderful girls, and I know whatever we do will be special no matter what.
I know they say opposites attract, but isn't that supposed to just pertain to chemistry/romantic endeavors? Or does that hold true for all relationships regardless of their intimacy level? I guess I've always had more guy friends. Well, I've never been able to keep girlfriends is more like it. I think back to my "best friends" in my younger days and am sad to think of how many of them I've drifted far from. A lot of it was my fault. For some of them, I can name specific incidents that caused the rift that never got fully patched again. Sure, I'm still friends with all of these ladies, but I don't think we will ever be as close as we were then. If I ran into them in public we could talk and "catch up" but then what? No exchanging of new phone numbers, no future plans made (save for the vague mentioning of the fact we should get together some time) and then maybe a hasty online message via Facebook.
I wonder why it's so hard for me to befriend women and keep them close. It seems like someone always fails the relationship. When I was 8, it was my best friend who had moved away after living next door to me for years. She was coming to my birthday party and I hadn't seen her in some time. I was beside myself, looking out the window all the time, asking my mom when she would be there. I put my other friends on the back burner waiting for her to show. And she never did. And there was no phone call to say she wasn't coming. All I know is that I think my mom finally called her mom to see what traumatic event had caused her to not only not show, but not even bother to call. I believe the lame response had to do with which parent had custody of her that weekend. Or something equally pathetic. Maybe that was the first time I learned not to let myself get too close to a girlfriend if I didn't want to get hurt.
It goes on from there. Several altercations at various birthday parties, fighting on the school bus, name calling, preteen awkwardness and sensitive little girls all somehow made it clear that girls carry too much baggage. Even today, I love my female friends, but can only handle them alone in small doses. Even my sister, who is my best friend in the world, can get on my nerves pretty easily. Maybe there's some underlying competition going on. Who knows.
So my bachelorette party won't require the renting of a party bus or an entire floor of a hotel. But I like it that way. A handful of close friends is better than two dozen acquaintances that I might not even be friends with a year from now. My little baby sister will be the only one not legally able to drink, so we will either have to find a good 18+ club, or create Club Bride at home.
It's up to my wonderful girls, and I know whatever we do will be special no matter what.
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